COGNITIVE DISTORTION #4
Disqualifying the Positive
What are cognitive distortions? Different types of thoughts that are really "wrong" thoughts, errors in thinking that we have and that can send us spiralling down into depression. I gave you the first one “All-or-nothing thinking” in issue #15 June 29, the second one “Overgeneralization” was in issue #22 July 6, the third “Mental filter” in issue #27 July 13.
Today let’s talk about how good some of us are at disqualifying the positive or neutral experiences in life. We make sure they don’t count so as to keep validating those negative beliefs of ours.
For example, someone gives us a compliment and we think “oh they are just being nice. It’s not really true." We aren’t looking for the nice things about us because we don’t believe we are a nice person. We want validation that we are a failure, a loser.
This is one of the worst distortions and can contribute to severe depression – believing ourself worthless or bad. Even if people say they like us we think "they just don’t know the real me."
Next time – "Jumping to conclusions" including "mind reading" and "fortune telling".
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